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Triple Ds- Do Dating Differently. Here are three w

Triple Ds- Do Dating Differently. Here are three ways:

#1: Infuse fun back into your dating world. Ditch the narrative that dating sucks, dating's awful, it's a shit show. You don't have to partake in the shit show parts of dating. You can opt out. Retire that narrative and embrace the potential chaos. Allow yourself to be open to the idea that dating can be fun.

#2: Date with intention. Use every date as a way to learn something more about yourself, as an opportunity to practice something on that date. Not only learning something about yourself in that date, but practicing something that feels crunchy, edgy, brings up awkwardness or uncomfortableness for you. What would you like to lean into? What would you like to practice? What's your intention? And then pay attention.

# 3: Just enjoy the journey, my friends. Enjoy the freaking journey. Have fun. Be in the moment.

This is a snippet from my podcast. Find the entire episode on my podcast (Therapy in the Wild) or on Youtube: That Therapist Heather
The link for both is in my bio.
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Did this post resonate with you? Drop a like–share in the comments. ❤️
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#datingapps #single #dating #lovelife #relationshiprules #lovecoach #redflags #clinicalpsychology #divorcecoach #codependentnomore #innerchildwork #emotionallyunavailable #datingadviceforwomen #breakupssuck #consciouslove #relationshiptherapy #loveaddict #youareworthyoflove #secureattachment #datingtipsforwomen #consciousdating #gottman #relationshipanxiety #personalaccountability #attachmentpatterns #emotionallyfocusedtherapy #securerelationships

Let’s talk DATING APPS! They have become so comm

Let’s talk DATING APPS! They have become so common in today’s dating/single world. Hell… they are unfortunately also really common in the married world (gulp).

Study after study continues to prove how much damage these apps are causing mentally, emotionally, socially etc and yet time and time again they keep sucking “us” in. Despite single people desiring more than ever connection and partnership they keep turning to the apps that by and large are a massive contributing factor to the lack of partnership. A vast majority of those using apps are using them as a distraction mechanism, a validation tool.

If you are going to use the apps, I highly encourage you to have a high level of discernment and boundaries.

Such as:
-left on profiles that show no real effort or intentionality
-left on profiles that make it clear they want something different then you (ie they are making it clear they are just their for casual and you desire something with more substance)
-have a general idea of how much you are willing to communicate on the app before an effort and follow through is made to meet in person.

What have you found works and doesn’t work for you on the dating apps?
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#datingapps #single #dating #lovelife #relationshiprules #lovecoach #redflags #clinicalpsychology #divorcecoach #traumabonding #codependentnomore #innerchildwork #emotionallyunavailable #datingadviceforwomen #breakupssuck #consciouslove #relationshiptherapy #loveaddict #youareworthyoflove #secureattachment #datingtipsforwomen #consciousdating #relationshipanxiety #personalaccountability #attachmentpatterns #emotionallyfocusedtherapy #securerelationships

The moment you start turning to your friends and t

The moment you start turning to your friends and the internet to get clarity and decipher behavior that's not feeling good, that's your red flag. Our bodies are always trying to give you clues. It's just a matter of slowing down, listening to what your body is telling you, which means trusting yourself. There is a difference between looking and sounding the part and actually embodying the part. Don’t waste your time with those checklists. More often than not, the thing you need to pay attention to is consistency. Ask yourself, Are they showing up the way they promised? If your friends and family don't like them, or something seems off. Listen to what your friends and family say. And more importantly, listen to what you're saying.

This is a snippet from my podcast. Find the entire episode on my podcast (Therapy in the Wild) or on Youtube: That Therapist Heather
The link for both is in my bio.
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Did this post resonate with you? Drop a like–share in the comments. ❤️
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#relationshiprules #lovecoach #redflags #clinicalpsychology #divorcecoach #traumabonding #codependentnomore #innerchildwork #emotionallyunavailable #datingadviceforwomen #breakupssuck #consciouslove #relationshiptherapy #loveaddict #youareworthyoflove #secureattachment #parenting #soloparenting #datingtipsforwomen #traumabonds #consciousdating #gottman #relationshipanxiety #personalaccountability #positivecoparenting #attachmentpatterns #emotionallyfocusedtherapy #securerelationships

Let’s talk coparenting. A very unfortunate fact

Let’s talk coparenting. A very unfortunate fact is that sometimes- often times. The “custodial” parent is making it so fing impossible for the non custodial parent to have a relationship with their kids that the NC parent slowly fades to the background. Then the custodial parent gets more and more pissed at how they have no real help and their coparent isn’t stepping up to the plate. Let’s do a better job of encouraging a relationship between both parents. Set aside your adult issues and allow them to remain a separate entity apart from the relationship with the child and their parent. ❤️ I get it. This isn’t as black and white as an Instagram post can make it seem. There are definitely some cases where safety risks are a real thing but by and large the majority of co parenting cases that is not what is happening or a component to what is going on. The majority of coparenting cases is heavily one parent doesn’t like what the other parent is or is not doing and uses the kids as leverage. Take a look at your side and ask yourself how can you set aside your adult upset and put your kiddos and their relationship with their parent first and foremost. Said with love from one coparent to another ❤️#relationshipgoals #selflove #love #relationshipquotes #lovequotes #healing #breakup #relationshipproblems #therapy #breakupquotes #narcissist #relationships #relationshipadvice #dating #datingadvice #mentalhealth #relationship #marriage #datingtips #therelationshipexperts #toxicrelationships #codependentnomore #codependency #codependent #attachmentstyles #singles #dating #singlelife #parenting #parentinghack #coparenting

This is a common “mistake”…. Are you guilty

This is a common “mistake”…. Are you guilty of this?
This is a good way to set yourself up for failure, defeat, hopelessness etc. Set yourself up for success by placing the focus and emphasis on you and being your most authentic self. Having a great time and it being a great evening out and it not being dependent on being picked up, flirted with, or finding a date. #relationshipgoals #selflove #love #relationshipquotes #lovequotes #healing #breakup #relationshipproblems #therapy #breakupquotes #narcissist #relationships #relationshipadvice #dating #datingadvice #mentalhealth #relationship #marriage #datingtips #therelationshipexperts #toxicrelationships #codependentnomore #codependency #codependent #attachmentstyles #singles #dating #singlelife #parenting #parentinghack

We get defensive when people talk about our behavi

We get defensive when people talk about our behavior, even if it's true. Especially if it’s true! We absolutely do not have to agree with their perception of our behavior. But we all have the right to say “You've done something that has heavily impacted me.” When we discuss someone’s behavior, we are sharing our heart, our experience of the situation, the impact, the hurt, the pain, the confusion. When these things are discussed, I want you to ask yourself: How are they showing up when you bring their behaviors to the light? Are they working with you, working on themselves? Or are they shutting down your perspective? More importantly, Let's have some ownership. You're in a situation. This dynamic continues to play out. What's the part of you that's staying in that dynamic?

This is a snippet from my podcast. Find the entire episode on my podcast (Therapy in the Wild) or on Youtube: That Therapist Heather
The link for both is in my bio.
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Did this post resonate with you? Drop a like–share in the comments. ❤️
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#relationshiprules #lovecoach #redflags #clinicalpsychology #divorcecoach #traumabonding #codependentnomore #innerchildwork #emotionallyunavailable #datingadviceforwomen #breakupssuck #consciouslove #relationshiptherapy #loveaddict #youareworthyoflove #secureattachment #parenting #soloparenting #datingtipsforwomen #traumabonds #consciousdating #gottman #relationshipanxiety #personalaccountability #positivecoparenting #attachmentpatterns #emotionallyfocusedtherapy #securerelationships

I encourage you to choose your experience with lif

I encourage you to choose your experience with life. You set your own expectations for your world. And, you are also in control of how you react to those expectations being met or not. How are you showing up in times when your expectations aren't being met?

Find the entire episode on my podcast (Therapy in the Wild) or on youtube: That Therapist Heather
The link for both is in my bio.
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#relationshipgoals #selflove #love #relationshipquotes #lovequotes #healing #breakup #relationshipproblems #therapy #breakupquotes #narcissist #relationships #relationshipadvice #dating #datingadvice #mentalhealth #relationship #marriage #datingtips #therelationshipexperts #toxicrelationships #codependentnomore #codependency #codependent #attachmentstyles #marriage #trauma #attachmentstyle #couplestherapist

In this conversation, Heather discusses her recent

In this conversation, Heather discusses her recent Singles Mixer event and reflects on the different experiences and reactions of the attendees. She emphasizes the importance of taking ownership of our interactions and experiences, not letting others define our experiences, and examining the stories we tell ourselves. Heather encourages listeners to choose how they interact with life and turn pain into power. She also highlights the significance of community and connection, particularly in the context of dating apps and the dating scene. Finally, she urges individuals to take control and change patterns that lead to negative experiences.
takeaways

Two people can attend the same event and have completely different experiences, highlighting the importance of self-reflection and understanding our own perspectives.
We have the power to choose how we interact with life and take ownership of our experiences.
Don't let someone else or something else define and dictate your experience. Take control and cultivate the world you desire.
Examine the stories you tell yourself and question the underlying emotions and patterns that may be influencing your experiences.
Turn pain into power by choosing how you respond to life's challenges and using them as opportunities for growth.
Community and connection are essential for personal well-being, especially in the context of dating and relationships.
Take control of your experiences and change patterns that lead to negative outcomes.

Find the entire episode on my podcast (Therapy in the Wild) or on youtube: That Therapist Heather
The link for both is in my bio.

Last nights singles social mixer/speed dating at J

Last nights singles social mixer/speed dating at Jumping Jackalope Axe Throwing
Major high fives to all those who pushed past an edge to come! I know that new and unknown things can be really edgy and funcomfortable. High fives to all of you who attended and said yes to YOU. Trying something new!!!
It was great to see everyone there.
A gentle reminder:
1) things are often what we choose to make them (meaning we can find and focus on the flaws, the negatives etc or we can highlight the good, the strengths, the positives).
2) be your most magnetic self. Don't allow whether you met someone or not be the determining factor as to whether you had a great time or whether it sucked......

Sometimes in life, our bodies will tell us when it

Sometimes in life, our bodies will tell us when it’s time to get out. I recently said “yes” to a second date, even though, on the first date, I felt an anxious sensation; my body was telling me “No!”. If it doesn’t feel right, it’s probably wrong. I encourage you to say no faster if it doesn’t feel right. Hold the boundary. The faster you own the no and you get out of something that is not serving you in the way you desire to be served, the faster you're available for the things that do serve you, for the things that are a yes to you. So, I ask you this, are there things in your life that you feel are a no that you're still holding onto?

The content in this post are excerpts from the podcast, released on Mondays on all major podcast platforms and for my visual people on YouTube. I appreciate you tuning in and listening. Links are in the description!
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Did this post resonate with you? Drop a like–share in the comments. ❤️
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#relationshiprules #lovecoach #redflags #clinicalpsychology #divorcecoach #traumabonding #codependentnomore #innerchildwork #emotionallyunavailable #datingadviceforwomen #breakupssuck #consciouslove #relationshiptherapy #loveaddict #youareworthyoflove #secureattachment #parenting #soloparenting #datingtipsforwomen #traumabonds #consciousdating #gottman #relationshipanxiety #personalaccountability #positivecoparenting #attachmentpatterns #emotionallyfocusedtherapy #securerelationships

Negative self-talk is like tug of war, where you'r

Negative self-talk is like tug of war, where you're trying to pull your life one direction, and this alter ego of yourself, the limiting belief itself, is trying to pull you the other direction. It is very difficult, not impossible, to confront and sit in that crunchy, icky space. But, digging into that negative inner-dialogue is the only way to start managing it a little differently. Try to understand the "why" behind those things you tell yourself. Then, show those negative thoughts another side of you. Follow through. Honor your own word. If you say you’re going to do something, do it. Then you start to show yourself and switch that mindset. I don't give myself excuses. I honor my word. I can trust myself. I can do this.

The content in this post are excerpts from the podcast, released on Mondays on all major podcast platforms and for my visual people on YouTube. I appreciate you tuning in and listening. Links are in the description!
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Did this post resonate with you? Drop a like–share in the comments. ❤️
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#relationshiprules #lovecoach #redflags #clinicalpsychology #divorcecoach #traumabonding #codependentnomore #innerchildwork #emotionallyunavailable #datingadviceforwomen #breakupssuck #consciouslove #relationshiptherapy #loveaddict #youareworthyoflove #secureattachment #parenting #soloparenting #datingtipsforwomen #traumabonds #consciousdating #gottman #relationshipanxiety #personalaccountability #positivecoparenting #attachmentpatterns #emotionallyfocusedtherapy #securerelationships

As we enter February; if you made a resolution, I

As we enter February; if you made a resolution, I want to ask you: Did you consider the “why?” behind your New Year’s resolution? Not first having done the work around the why could be the barrier between you and not achieving your goals in the past. I'm not a fan of New Year’s resolutions. What am I a fan of? Intentions. So instead of looking at it as a New Year's resolution, I encourage you to look at it as an intention. Get some clarity on what the barriers have been and then, what are some of the things you could implement. I encourage you to anchor in and remember, you don't need a new year to decide to change your damn life. You can do it right now!!

The content in this post are excerpts from the podcast, released on Mondays on all major podcast platforms and for my visual people on YouTube. I appreciate you tuning in and listening. Links are in the description!
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Did this post resonate with you? Drop a like–share in the comments. ❤️
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#relationshiprules #lovecoach #redflags #clinicalpsychology #divorcecoach #traumabonding #codependentnomore #innerchildwork #emotionallyunavailable #datingadviceforwomen #breakupssuck #consciouslove #relationshiptherapy #loveaddict #youareworthyoflove #secureattachment #parenting #soloparenting #datingtipsforwomen #traumabonds #consciousdating #gottman #relationshipanxiety #personalaccountability #positivecoparenting #attachmentpatterns #emotionallyfocusedtherapy #securerelationships

This one feels especially relevant to me today. Re

This one feels especially relevant to me today. Reminder, PSA, you do NOT have to have a reason to make a change in your life. A crisis or life altering "thing" does not have to happen for you to decide you want to choose a new way, a different way. You get to decide to make changes BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT YOU WANT TO DO!! Period. End of story!
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#relationshipgoals #selflove #love #relationshipquotes #lovequotes #healing #breakup #relationshipproblems #therapy #breakupquotes #narcissist #relationships #relationshipadvice #dating #datingadvice #mentalhealth #relationship #marriage #datingtips #therelationshipexperts #toxicrelationships #codependentnomore #codependency #codependent #attachmentstyles #marriage #trauma #attachmentstyle #couplestherapist

F*cked up fact: People who are afraid someone is m

F*cked up fact: People who are afraid someone is mad at them or will be mad at them often grew up in a home where focusing on other’s needs was part of their survival strategy. They placed a heavy emphasis on others and ensuring others were “ok” and in turn they often got shunned, given silent treatment, shamed etc.

This cycle caused them to be on extremely high alert trying not to get hurt over and over which then resulted in them trying even harder to make the other person happy, proud of them etc.

The reality is that those people you were constantly trying to please and keep happy… they are highly abusive, manipulative, and well nothing you do will ever cause them to change or treat you differently. It is not now nor was it ever about YOU. It is about them and their own inner fears and trauma. Take your power back. Focus on you. Release yourself from trying to fix or save them.
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Did this post resonate with you? Drop a like–share in the comments. ❤️
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#relationshiprules #lovecoach #redflags #clinicalpsychology #divorcecoach #traumabonding #codependentnomore #innerchildwork #emotionallyunavailable #datingadviceforwomen #breakupssuck #consciouslove #relationshiptherapy #loveaddict #youareworthyoflove #secureattachment #parenting #soloparenting #datingtipsforwomen #traumabonds #consciousdating #gottman #relationshipanxiety #personalaccountability #positivecoparenting #attachmentpatterns #emotionallyfocusedtherapy #securerelationships

Let’s talk naming your child….. what name did

Let’s talk naming your child….. what name did you almost (or did) you name your kiddo 🤣❤️🔥 #parenting #namingkids #babynames #therapist #coparenting

Co-parenting relationships. Let's talk about it. A

Co-parenting relationships. Let's talk about it. A common theme that often happens is that co-parents continue to play out the same dysfunctional patterns that they did in their relationship(romantic partnership)-only now it is as co-parents instead of partners. 😑

Parent A and Parent B get to decide to stay in their own lane and focus on their lane. Stop engaging in the relationship that continues to enable the relationship dysfunction, frustration etc.

This isn't a blanket statement and certainly can be more nuanced but by and large this applies to soooo many co-parenting dynamics out there.

Try it a different way. Stay in your lane. Allow the other parent to fumble the ball and figure out how to pick it back up and run with it! 🔥
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#relationshipproblems #therapy #breakupquotes #narcissist #relationships #relationshipadvice #dating #datingadvice #mentalhealth #relationship #marriage #datingtips #toxicrelationships #codependentnomore #codependency #codependent #attachmentstyles #singles #dating #singlelife #coparenting #coparentingtips #divorced

Speaking Your Truth, Understanding Perception & Fa

Speaking Your Truth, Understanding Perception & Facing the Facts

In this transformative episode of "Therapy in the Wild," Heather delves into the crucial aspects of speaking your truth, understanding perception, and facing the facts in relationships. She unravels the dynamics of truth-telling, shedding light on the impact of our actions, navigating attempts at ‘shutting your voice down,’ and recognizing patterns that keep us stuck. This episode offers empowering insights on owning your truth, fostering healthy dialogue, and reclaiming your voice. Whether navigating uncomfortable realities or fostering healthy dialogue, this episode offers a roadmap for embracing authenticity and breaking free from patterns that keep us silent.

Today on Therapy in the Wild:

● Verbalizing your truth

● Evaluating the facts

● Rejecting silencing dynamics

● Understanding perception

● Breaking free from unhealthy patterns
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#relationshipgoals #selflove #love #relationshipquotes #lovequotes #healing #breakup #relationshipproblems #therapy #breakupquotes #narcissist #relationships #relationshipadvice #dating #datingadvice #mentalhealth #relationship #marriage #datingtips #therelationshipexperts #toxicrelationships #codependentnomore #codependency #codependent #attachmentstyles #marriage #trauma #attachmentstyle #couplestherapist

What would happen if you sat with it? If you sat w

What would happen if you sat with it? If you sat with it instead of running from it? Instead of distracting yourself from it? Whatever your distraction method is: smoking, drinking, eating, porn, f*cking, running….whatever your distraction method, what if you just sat with it? Allowed yourself to be with the pain, the lonely, the sad?!?

Healing happens by feeling, going through it. Not around it. Not bypassing it. Not numbing out or distracting yourself from it.
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Did this post resonate with you? Drop a like–share in the comments. ❤️
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#lovecoach #redflags #clinicalpsychology #divorcecoach #traumabonding #codependentnomore #innerchildwork #emotionallyunavailable #datingadviceforwomen #breakupssuck #consciouslove #relationshiptherapy #loveaddict #youareworthyoflove #secureattachment #parenting #soloparenting #datingtipsforwomen #traumabonds #consciousdating #gottman #relationshipanxiety #personalaccountability #singlemom #solomom #positivecoparenting #attachmentpatterns #emotionallyfocusedtherapy #securerelationships

The buzz word “trauma bond”, here’s how you

The buzz word “trauma bond”, here’s how you can quickly identify if you are indeed in a trauma bound relationship. Are you holding on really tight to the times you remember are good? Waiting for the good times??
That’s a trauma bond. A healthy loving relationship is CONSISTENT!! You aren’t holding your breath, waiting -longing dying for the bits of times that are “good”.
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#relationshipgoals #selflove #love #relationshipquotes #lovequotes #healing #breakup #relationshipproblems #therapy #breakupquotes #narcissist #relationships #relationshipadvice #dating #datingadvice #mentalhealth #relationship #marriage #datingtips #therelationshipexperts #toxicrelationships #codependentnomore #codependency #codependent #attachmentstyles #marriage #trauma #attachmentstyle #couplestherapist

How to embrace loneliness. Loneliness gets a bad r

How to embrace loneliness. Loneliness gets a bad rap. People do a lot of things to avoid the discomfort of feeling lonely. What if you embraced and honored the lonely instead of trying to bypass it. What is your inner self really seeking? Really missing?

Reach out to friends and own/name it. Hey, I am feeling really lonely lately. Would you please invite me out?
Or
Reach out to someone and invite them out. Hey, I am feeling lonely lately and could really use to have some time with friends. Are you free this weekend sometime to get together?
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Did this post resonate with you? Drop a like–share in the comments. ❤️
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#breakups #relationshiprules #lovecoach #clinicalpsychology #divorcecoach #traumabonding #codependentnomore #innerchildwork #emotionallyunavailable #datingadviceforwomen #breakupssuck #consciouslove #relationshiptherapy #loveaddict #youareworthyoflove #secureattachment #soloparenting #datingtipsforwomen #traumabonds #consciousdating #gottman #relationshipanxiety #personalaccountability #singlemom #solomom #positivecoparenting #attachmentpatterns #emotionallyfocusedtherapy #securerelationships

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